After a summer in which nothing good came out for most of June or July, 3 new, high profile albums have come out in August. First, the Kanye/Jay-Z joint album, Watch the Throne; then came The Game's album, The R.E.D. Album. Today, I downloaded Tha Carter IV from Lil Wayne. Since I haven't had class, I've spent the last few weeks listening through them enough to get a good sense. So I guess I'll cram my review of all three into one post.
The first to come out was Watch the Throne. I had really high expectations for this album. Every time Kanye and Jay have collaborated in the past, the result has been pretty explosive. On Kanye's last album, "So Appalled" was a great track. "Run This Town" was memorable. Kanye produced "Heart of the City" from The Blueprint. So, judging by that bar, the album was a disappointment in the sense that not EVERY track was as great as their previous collaborations. But, objectively, it was still a pretty good album. "No Church in the Wild" with Frank Ocean is a really good track-- Kanye's verse in it is unreal. Jay comes back and does great things in "Murder to Excellence". And, while the boasting on "Otis" isn't necessarily original, it showcases both Jay and Kanye at their best. The rest of the tracks aren't necessarily bad, but there's nothing else that's memorable. And, given that I expected half the album to be memorable, I'm a bit disappointed. But, still, objectively, this is a B+ album.
Next was The R.E.D. Album. Now, I'm not a huge Game fan. His lyrics are pretty simplistic. His flow is pretty solid, though, and this album is about as good as he gets. "The City" starts the album off well-- a dark beat with a heavy bass highlights Game's flow. "Drug Test" is also solid-- I'm not a big fan of the flow; it's quicker than is ideal for Game, and Dre is a bit out of place on the track: his flow is heavy and he doesn't do well with quick beats either, but it's still a pretty good track. "Martians vs. Goblins" with Lil Wayne is pretty good. The beat is more in line with what both Wayne and Game excel in. I think the best part, though, might be a new artist named Tyler, the Creator, who comes in and lays down an absurd verse that reminds me of what Bizarre used to do for D-12: hate on everyone and drop occasionally amusing punch lines. But my favorite track on the album is "Red Nation", which samples the old stadium track "Zombie Nation" for its beat. The beat is ideal for Game's flow, covering up the silly lyrics. And the Wayne hook is great. I wish Game and Wayne would put out an album together-- they tend to do real well when they collaborate. The two collabs on this album are great, and they're just as good together in "My Life" from Game's last album, LAX. Overall, I think I give this one a B: solid, but a lot of filler at the back. But then I can't imagine giving a Game album better than a B, so I guess I like it.
Tha Carter IV is an especially weird album. It's the first solo album Lil Wayne's released since he spent the better part of a year in jail on weapons charges. Before he got locked up, he was putting out a top-notch mixtape every 3-4 months (No Ceilings and Dedication 3 were my personal favorites); plus, one of the better hip-hop albums of all time in Tha Carter III. Literally half of the 16 tracks were top-notch. So I didn't really know what to expect from this one: since getting out of jail, Wayne's mostly done collaboration on others' albums, and he's done pretty well; his appearance on Eminem's last album in "No Love" was great. When I started this album, I thought this would be a historically great album. The very first track, "Blunt Blowin", is, for my money, one of Wayne's best ever. The beat is incredible, Wayne is lyrically on top of his game, and he's really on his game. But, as I listened more, I felt like this was an album recorded in one sitting in which Wayne smoked a blunt, and waited as his high kicked in. The crisp delivery disappeared a few songs in, and by the time I got to "How to Love" it felt like Wayne was blazed out of his mind, and also half asleep. He recovered a bit and put together a couple of solid tracks in "President Carter" and "It's Good", but I still don't think it's anywhere near his best effort. While getting high probably helps him write his lyrics, I kind of wish he'd put down the weed and the codeine syrup when he goes to record, since he sounds like he's half-asleep on most of his tracks on this album. While this is still a solid album, all things told, it definitely doesn't live up to the early promise. For me, this is a B/B- album.
Showing posts with label Rap. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rap. Show all posts
Monday, August 29, 2011
Saturday, July 23, 2011
P-Diddy Ruined Music
In the history of music, very few people have managed to do real lasting damage. Boy bands in the 90's were awful, but they also shriveled up and disappeared as quickly as they appeared. Whatever talented members they had (Justin Timberlake) went into acting/making club bangers with Timbaland, and the rest shriveled up and went away. They still made some awful crap, like this insult to music:
But, luckily, no one listened to it, and they disappeared. Probably to make cameos on Entourage for people to laugh at. Ringtone rappers come in waves, and they do their best to suck, but they really only impact rap. I don't like Hurricane Chris and Chingy any more than any other rap fans, but it's hard to say that they're destroying music.
P-Diddy. Or Diddy. Or Puffy. Or whatever he calls himself these days has had probably the most effective campaign to destroy all music. First, there's rap. Now, P-Diddy isn't a very talented rapper, but he's not the worst there is. He blows, say, Gucci out of the water. His flow is mediocre, and his lyrics are cliche, but that just makes him a dime a dozen, not exceptionally bad. Either way, it wasn't rap that made him famous. He first became a big name when he established Bad Boy Records in 1993. That's when he became famous as "The guy who stands behind Biggie in his videos chuckling and dropping 'uh-huh' and 'yeah'" in at pretty inopportune moments. And at that point, no one really minded him anyway. Sure, he was kind of a clown, and everyone made fun of him the same way they made fun of Jermaine Dupri for being the guy who's hanging on to every aspiring pre-teen rapper in the game. See: Example below.
But then, in 1997, Biggie was gunned down, and P-Diddy had no clue what to do. His cash cow was dead. But Biggie was arguably the best rapper of his generation, and without a doubt one of the greatest of all time. So finding another Biggie just wasn't very likely. So P-Diddy decided the right move was... to try his hand at rap himself. That's where he ran into a problem. As I might have pointed out, he wasn't much of a rapper. And, unlike Dr. Dre, whose unspectacular (though still MILES better than Diddy's) ability as an MC was overshadowed by his legendary beats and production ability, P-Diddy couldn't make beats either. So that's when he decided to take a nuclear bomb to rap and start ripping off classic songs. And making them not just worse, but awful. And he didn't just do it once and disappear, the way ringtone rappers do now. He did it over and over and over.
It started out tolerable, because he'd take old tracks from Biggie and throw them onto the track. Also Frank Reynolds made an appearance in the Victory video. And the video was pretty sick, so I could give him a free pass for stealing his beat from "Going the Distance" from Rocky.
But that was just the beginning. Pretty soon he'd managed to turn Grandmaster Flash's The Message (a social commentary on gangs and a rap classic) into a piece of steaming garbage about nothing, in which he and his buddy Mase (whose claims to fame were 1) sounding EXACTLY like P-Diddy on the track, and 2) quitting his job as P-Diddy's voice double to try to become a church minister. Which he also quit.) made a video in which they hung out in a padded white room for awhile.
But that was just the beginning. Other victims included I Did it for Love by Love Unlimited. Which P-Diddy turned into It's All About the Benjamins. Which Wikipedia describes as being about "living rich and the importance of having money."
Then there was I'll Be Missing You. Where he took Sting and the Police's song about... stalking and turned it into... a posthumous tribute to the guy he stalked. Then he did his best to destroy classic rock by convincing Jimmy Page's coked-out corpse to appear on Come With Me and play the guitar riff from Led Zeppelin's Kashmir. Now, Kashmir as a song doesn't really make much sense, probably because Page and Robert Plant probably wrote it after doing a mountain of coke and then huffing all the glue at the Home Depot. But it sure as hell was NOT about Godzilla. But, surprise, the Godzilla soundtrack is exactly where the Zeppelin classic showed up.
And that was pretty much the last straw. After a 3-year run of destruction, P-Diddy kind of disappeared. Yeah, he and his soul patch still made appearances with Jennifer Lopez at award shows, and in that absurd billboard over Times Square, but he stopped trying to make music. Unfortunately, now, every time I watch Rocky, every time I hear Sting come on, and whenever I listen to Zeppelin, I think about P-Diddy and I get angry.
Thank you, P-Diddy, for ruining music. I hope your next album doesn't sell a single copy.
But, luckily, no one listened to it, and they disappeared. Probably to make cameos on Entourage for people to laugh at. Ringtone rappers come in waves, and they do their best to suck, but they really only impact rap. I don't like Hurricane Chris and Chingy any more than any other rap fans, but it's hard to say that they're destroying music.
P-Diddy. Or Diddy. Or Puffy. Or whatever he calls himself these days has had probably the most effective campaign to destroy all music. First, there's rap. Now, P-Diddy isn't a very talented rapper, but he's not the worst there is. He blows, say, Gucci out of the water. His flow is mediocre, and his lyrics are cliche, but that just makes him a dime a dozen, not exceptionally bad. Either way, it wasn't rap that made him famous. He first became a big name when he established Bad Boy Records in 1993. That's when he became famous as "The guy who stands behind Biggie in his videos chuckling and dropping 'uh-huh' and 'yeah'" in at pretty inopportune moments. And at that point, no one really minded him anyway. Sure, he was kind of a clown, and everyone made fun of him the same way they made fun of Jermaine Dupri for being the guy who's hanging on to every aspiring pre-teen rapper in the game. See: Example below.
But then, in 1997, Biggie was gunned down, and P-Diddy had no clue what to do. His cash cow was dead. But Biggie was arguably the best rapper of his generation, and without a doubt one of the greatest of all time. So finding another Biggie just wasn't very likely. So P-Diddy decided the right move was... to try his hand at rap himself. That's where he ran into a problem. As I might have pointed out, he wasn't much of a rapper. And, unlike Dr. Dre, whose unspectacular (though still MILES better than Diddy's) ability as an MC was overshadowed by his legendary beats and production ability, P-Diddy couldn't make beats either. So that's when he decided to take a nuclear bomb to rap and start ripping off classic songs. And making them not just worse, but awful. And he didn't just do it once and disappear, the way ringtone rappers do now. He did it over and over and over.
It started out tolerable, because he'd take old tracks from Biggie and throw them onto the track. Also Frank Reynolds made an appearance in the Victory video. And the video was pretty sick, so I could give him a free pass for stealing his beat from "Going the Distance" from Rocky.
But that was just the beginning. Pretty soon he'd managed to turn Grandmaster Flash's The Message (a social commentary on gangs and a rap classic) into a piece of steaming garbage about nothing, in which he and his buddy Mase (whose claims to fame were 1) sounding EXACTLY like P-Diddy on the track, and 2) quitting his job as P-Diddy's voice double to try to become a church minister. Which he also quit.) made a video in which they hung out in a padded white room for awhile.
But that was just the beginning. Other victims included I Did it for Love by Love Unlimited. Which P-Diddy turned into It's All About the Benjamins. Which Wikipedia describes as being about "living rich and the importance of having money."
Then there was I'll Be Missing You. Where he took Sting and the Police's song about... stalking and turned it into... a posthumous tribute to the guy he stalked. Then he did his best to destroy classic rock by convincing Jimmy Page's coked-out corpse to appear on Come With Me and play the guitar riff from Led Zeppelin's Kashmir. Now, Kashmir as a song doesn't really make much sense, probably because Page and Robert Plant probably wrote it after doing a mountain of coke and then huffing all the glue at the Home Depot. But it sure as hell was NOT about Godzilla. But, surprise, the Godzilla soundtrack is exactly where the Zeppelin classic showed up.
And that was pretty much the last straw. After a 3-year run of destruction, P-Diddy kind of disappeared. Yeah, he and his soul patch still made appearances with Jennifer Lopez at award shows, and in that absurd billboard over Times Square, but he stopped trying to make music. Unfortunately, now, every time I watch Rocky, every time I hear Sting come on, and whenever I listen to Zeppelin, I think about P-Diddy and I get angry.
Thank you, P-Diddy, for ruining music. I hope your next album doesn't sell a single copy.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Worst Rappers Alive
I'm not gonna lie-- I love rap. I've loved rap for as long as I can remember. In the third grade, I used to bring my portable radio on the school bus to listen to DC's two hip-hop stations, WPGC (Donnie Simpson Morning Show) and WKYS (Russ Parr in the Morning). So I've been listening to rap since Busta Rhymes was making hits and when Puff Daddy was in his element, standing in the back of Biggie's videos, providing every unnecessary "Uh", "Yeah" and "Come on". But rap's gone quite a bit downhill since that time. Tupac and Biggie are dead. Jay-Z isn't quite so prolific. Nas never was all that prolific, but he's less so now. And Dr. Dre's Detox might come out someday... But mixed in with "rappers" who make ringtones instead of beats, there's still some talent. Eminem's still around, and Recovery was, for my money, his most underrated album. And people love to hate on Lil' Wayne, but his lyrics are some of the greatest ever. But mixed in with the gems, there's some total garbage that's been coming out, and that's what this post is about. Now, for the purpose of this, I'm ignoring the obvious garbage. Soulja Boy, Hurricane Chris, and the Shop Boyz (remember them?) are NOT rappers. So I'm not gonna dignify them with a spot even on this list. But the ones on my list have actually released multiple albums and been in the spotlight for awhile. So... here's my list.
1. Cam'Ron-- My boy Matty K is definitely gonna throw me under the bus for this one, but it has to be said. Cam'Ron's been around forever. I have no clue why he's been around forever. Cam'Ron, as a rapper, doesn't bring much of anything to the table. His flow is so-so, but what really sets him apart are his awful lyrics. Cam'Ron raps about everything most rappers do, except he does it worse. He also has the subtlety of a jackhammer. Just listen to "Suck it or Not". One of Cam's better known tracks. And, lyrically, completely absurd. I'm trying to keep this blog at least out of the X-rated area, so I won't post all the lyrics, but the entire track is about... exactly what you expect it to be about. Then if Cam's lack of subtlety isn't enough, Lil Wayne gets on the track and starts his verse with "I get head in the strangest places"... And that's the best part of the song.
If that's not enough, Cam is just as bad away from the mic. When I was in high school, Cam decided to come through DC in his Lambo during Howard University's homecoming. Unsprisingly, someone decided they wanted Cam's Lambo and shot him. Now imagine if he weren't one of the worst rappers of all time. Does anyone think Ice Cube got robbed when he rolled through Compton?
Lastly, there's Cam's movie. A few years after releasing a few multi-platinum albums, Eminem (who was always about a bazillion times better at rap than Cam) decided to make a semi-autobiographical movie for which he wrote a soundtrck. Shockingly, the movie was semi-decent, and even featured Eminem's buddy Cheddar Bob doing a star turn as Plaxico Burress. Cam, on the other hand, after releasing a bunch of crummy albums, decided to make a semi-autobiographical movie of his own. But while 8 Mile featured Brittany Murphy and Mekhi Phifer and was backed by a studio, Cam produced and released his movie, Killa Season... straight to Google Video. The reason I know about this is because at some point in the first half of undergrad, I came to Matty K's room, and we watched the whole thing. On his laptop. I still have no clue what the plot was. All I remember is he had a friend who liked the same things that he liked: "B!tches, cars, and MONEY." And he said "no homo" a lot. If anyone wants to check out Killa Season, it's probably still up on You Tube. If the whole thing isn't, here's the scene that sums it up:
Cam is a joke
2. Gucci Mane-- Gucci's lyrics are almost as bad as Cam'Ron's. Heck, they might be worse. And Gucci has a tattoo of an ice cream cone on his face. That might be the worst tattoo in the history of tattoos. That alone gets him a spot on this list. But I'm pretty sure Gucci sits on his couch all day, saying "Brrrrr", eating pizza and drinking cough syrup. But mostly drinking cough syrup. Then he looks around, sees something, and decides to make a track about it. Sometimes, it's alcohol. Other times, it's lemonade. Yes, he made a song about lemonade. It's called "Lemonade". In the music video, there's a yellow car, and Gucci and a bunch of women dressed in yellow. The rest of the lyrics I can't understand because Gucci may or may not have spent the day he recorded that song huffing glue. Also, unlike most rappers, who spend the time they don't spend in the studio either at the gym and roiding (50 Cent) or at Dunkin' Donuts training to be a planetarium (Rick Ross), Gucci somehow managed to get the physique of an upside-down ice cream cone. Which, again, adds up to him being a clown.
3. 50 Cent-- For some reason, he's put out a few hit albums. Why, I don't know. I guess his hook is he got shot a bunch of times. But there's nothing redeeming about his rap. His flow stinks, his lyrics don't make any sense, and his diction is horrible. He sounds like he had the bottom half of his jaw shot off and replaced with a wooden replica. That was whittled by a beaver high on Gucci's cough syrup. He also managed to get overshadowed on his own track by Justin Timberlake. I'm not gonna lie-- I love JT. But when your R&B hook is better than your verse, it's probably time to give up.
4. Holla Man from the 7th Floor Crew-- This one's a wild card. Not many people know about the 7th Floor Crew. They actually only technically released one song, so maybe they don't quite belong on this list, but I can't help myself. At some point in high school, my buddy Collin and I discovered the 7th Floor Crew. On MySpace. I forget which of us found it, but I do remember that we stared at each other dumbfounded the whole time. Not that it's necessarily THAT much raunchier than all other rap-- Cam'Ron's probably just as bad, and Li'l Kim is probably worse-- but the raunchiness on this album is completely ridiculous. Not to mention the ones on the track were mostly football players at Miami, and a bunch of them are in the NFL now. There's T-Good (Ravens linebacker Tavares Gooden), Big Beas (Panthers Pro Bowl linebacker Jon Beason), G-Reg (my favorite moniker: Bears tight end Greg Olsen), and, last but not least, Holla Man (supposedly Patriots safety Brandon Meriweather, though that one's uncomfirmed). Now the last two deserve special consideration. G-Reg's flow is surprisingly not awful, but his lyrics are completely ridiculous. Apparently, G-Reg fantasizes about putting his "third leg" (his words; also kinda rhyme with G-Reg) in many orifices in which it doesn't belong. But Holla Man takes the cake because his flow breaks down halfway through. Which is hard because its only unifying themes are "sex" and "things that end in -ack". So when that happens, Holla Man gives up trying and starts telling a story about something he did at the beach where he didn't wear a rub or... something like that, I mostly lost track. But for that incoherent, non-sensical outburst on the track, he gets a spot on this list.
5. Not Waka-- So I figured after throwing out some hate, I'd put down one rapper who doesn't make my list: Waka Flocka Flame. A lot of people hate on Waka because he 1) makes no sense, 2) slurs his words like he's had 15 shots of Jack in a row, 3) wears a "Fozzie the Bear" chain, and 4) Yells WAAAAAAAKKKAAA so much he sounds like a Pokemon. But I love Waka. Why? Because Waka spits slurred fire on the track, and because he's got sick dreads.
1. Cam'Ron-- My boy Matty K is definitely gonna throw me under the bus for this one, but it has to be said. Cam'Ron's been around forever. I have no clue why he's been around forever. Cam'Ron, as a rapper, doesn't bring much of anything to the table. His flow is so-so, but what really sets him apart are his awful lyrics. Cam'Ron raps about everything most rappers do, except he does it worse. He also has the subtlety of a jackhammer. Just listen to "Suck it or Not". One of Cam's better known tracks. And, lyrically, completely absurd. I'm trying to keep this blog at least out of the X-rated area, so I won't post all the lyrics, but the entire track is about... exactly what you expect it to be about. Then if Cam's lack of subtlety isn't enough, Lil Wayne gets on the track and starts his verse with "I get head in the strangest places"... And that's the best part of the song.
If that's not enough, Cam is just as bad away from the mic. When I was in high school, Cam decided to come through DC in his Lambo during Howard University's homecoming. Unsprisingly, someone decided they wanted Cam's Lambo and shot him. Now imagine if he weren't one of the worst rappers of all time. Does anyone think Ice Cube got robbed when he rolled through Compton?
Lastly, there's Cam's movie. A few years after releasing a few multi-platinum albums, Eminem (who was always about a bazillion times better at rap than Cam) decided to make a semi-autobiographical movie for which he wrote a soundtrck. Shockingly, the movie was semi-decent, and even featured Eminem's buddy Cheddar Bob doing a star turn as Plaxico Burress. Cam, on the other hand, after releasing a bunch of crummy albums, decided to make a semi-autobiographical movie of his own. But while 8 Mile featured Brittany Murphy and Mekhi Phifer and was backed by a studio, Cam produced and released his movie, Killa Season... straight to Google Video. The reason I know about this is because at some point in the first half of undergrad, I came to Matty K's room, and we watched the whole thing. On his laptop. I still have no clue what the plot was. All I remember is he had a friend who liked the same things that he liked: "B!tches, cars, and MONEY." And he said "no homo" a lot. If anyone wants to check out Killa Season, it's probably still up on You Tube. If the whole thing isn't, here's the scene that sums it up:
Cam is a joke
2. Gucci Mane-- Gucci's lyrics are almost as bad as Cam'Ron's. Heck, they might be worse. And Gucci has a tattoo of an ice cream cone on his face. That might be the worst tattoo in the history of tattoos. That alone gets him a spot on this list. But I'm pretty sure Gucci sits on his couch all day, saying "Brrrrr", eating pizza and drinking cough syrup. But mostly drinking cough syrup. Then he looks around, sees something, and decides to make a track about it. Sometimes, it's alcohol. Other times, it's lemonade. Yes, he made a song about lemonade. It's called "Lemonade". In the music video, there's a yellow car, and Gucci and a bunch of women dressed in yellow. The rest of the lyrics I can't understand because Gucci may or may not have spent the day he recorded that song huffing glue. Also, unlike most rappers, who spend the time they don't spend in the studio either at the gym and roiding (50 Cent) or at Dunkin' Donuts training to be a planetarium (Rick Ross), Gucci somehow managed to get the physique of an upside-down ice cream cone. Which, again, adds up to him being a clown.
3. 50 Cent-- For some reason, he's put out a few hit albums. Why, I don't know. I guess his hook is he got shot a bunch of times. But there's nothing redeeming about his rap. His flow stinks, his lyrics don't make any sense, and his diction is horrible. He sounds like he had the bottom half of his jaw shot off and replaced with a wooden replica. That was whittled by a beaver high on Gucci's cough syrup. He also managed to get overshadowed on his own track by Justin Timberlake. I'm not gonna lie-- I love JT. But when your R&B hook is better than your verse, it's probably time to give up.
4. Holla Man from the 7th Floor Crew-- This one's a wild card. Not many people know about the 7th Floor Crew. They actually only technically released one song, so maybe they don't quite belong on this list, but I can't help myself. At some point in high school, my buddy Collin and I discovered the 7th Floor Crew. On MySpace. I forget which of us found it, but I do remember that we stared at each other dumbfounded the whole time. Not that it's necessarily THAT much raunchier than all other rap-- Cam'Ron's probably just as bad, and Li'l Kim is probably worse-- but the raunchiness on this album is completely ridiculous. Not to mention the ones on the track were mostly football players at Miami, and a bunch of them are in the NFL now. There's T-Good (Ravens linebacker Tavares Gooden), Big Beas (Panthers Pro Bowl linebacker Jon Beason), G-Reg (my favorite moniker: Bears tight end Greg Olsen), and, last but not least, Holla Man (supposedly Patriots safety Brandon Meriweather, though that one's uncomfirmed). Now the last two deserve special consideration. G-Reg's flow is surprisingly not awful, but his lyrics are completely ridiculous. Apparently, G-Reg fantasizes about putting his "third leg" (his words; also kinda rhyme with G-Reg) in many orifices in which it doesn't belong. But Holla Man takes the cake because his flow breaks down halfway through. Which is hard because its only unifying themes are "sex" and "things that end in -ack". So when that happens, Holla Man gives up trying and starts telling a story about something he did at the beach where he didn't wear a rub or... something like that, I mostly lost track. But for that incoherent, non-sensical outburst on the track, he gets a spot on this list.
5. Not Waka-- So I figured after throwing out some hate, I'd put down one rapper who doesn't make my list: Waka Flocka Flame. A lot of people hate on Waka because he 1) makes no sense, 2) slurs his words like he's had 15 shots of Jack in a row, 3) wears a "Fozzie the Bear" chain, and 4) Yells WAAAAAAAKKKAAA so much he sounds like a Pokemon. But I love Waka. Why? Because Waka spits slurred fire on the track, and because he's got sick dreads.
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